Friends

This week I spent a bit of time talking to some good friends about some problems that I’m having at the moment. It always helps to have some great people you can always turn to no matter what is going on in your life, and they will be there for you to help you out in whatever way they can. That’s the true meaning of friendship I think.

Friendship is a tricky thing though. You need to strike a balance between being yourself and looking after your own life as well as being their for your friends. It sounds quite easy but in reality it is quite difficult. For instance, if you’re in a relationship, how do you juggle time with your other half and time with your friends? There are two things that you could try to help you out in this situation.

First, work out whats really important to you and then spend time doing activities that align with that. For instance if its more important to spend time with your friends, don’t be in a serious relationship that won’t let you do that! However if your main priority is improving your relationship then allocate time to doing that. Your true friends will understand what you’re doing and why as long as you let them know! Strike a balance with what’s most important to you.

The other thing to try is work out what you’ve invested in the friendship and determine if it’s equal? For example one of my friends has a really big heart and goes above and beyond for her friends all the time. Unfortunately though some of her friends take advantage of that and aren’t there for her to return the favour. Clearly in this case, things aren’t equal so she might want to stop investing so much time in that friendship and seek better connections with people who appreciate her for the great person she is.

Speaking of great people, I received an email from another friend of mine who’s a big fan of Dream,Build,Inspire,Lead! I asked her advice on some issues and this is part of the wisdom that she offered:

“I’ve learnt that people come into your life for a reason, season or a lifetime.And its these people who are there for a purpose at that point in time, because you choose them to be. They are there to help you with the struggles that are going on at that particular time in your life. That might mean that someone can guide you through the pain and difficulties and turn them into opportunities.”

So true! It’s very similar to one of my favourite quotes by a philosopher called Javan and it goes something like this:

“We are born into this world like a blank canvas. And each person that crosses our path takes up the brush and makes their mark upon our surface. So it is that we develop. But we must realize there comes a day when we must take up the brush and finish the work ourselves. For only we can determine if we are to be just another painting or a masterpiece.”

I’m glad I’ve got some great people who are willing to make their mark on my canvas, because I dont’ think I’m ready to pick up the brush just yet!

Finally I received this story via email about friendship and the extent that one person will go to make another happy. So this week, I challenge you to discover and improve the quality of your existing friendships because you never know when you’ll have difficulties in your life and might need some help in turning them into opportunities.

******************************************************** Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room’s only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation. Every afternoon, when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window. The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside.

The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.

As the man by the window described all this in exquisite details, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine this picturesque scene. One warm afternoon, the man by the window described a parade passing by. Although the other man could not hear the band, he could see it in his mind ‘s eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words. Days, weeks and months passed.

One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away. As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone. Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside. He strained to slowly turn to look out the window besides the bed. It faced a blank wall.

The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window. The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall. She said, “Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you.”

Epilogue: There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations. ********************************************************

Dream, Build, Inspire, Lead!

AJ~

Author: AJ Kulatunga

Category:

friendship, friends, inspire